So… it’s been 9 years since he left us… since he started dancing in the wind.. i believe that death makes us all angels.. it enlightens us all.. and it is not something to be sad about.. but rather .. we should celebrate death. I remember a quote from one of my favourite prose writers.. Kahlil Gibran… “And when the earth shall claim your limbs, then shall you truly dance.” So this is often why i refer to death and people being gone.. as dancing.. somewhere.. with the wind…

it’s a nice thought =) so i hold on to that.

Having said that… regardless of how i feel about death and how i have accepted it… .. I always miss my dad extra on these kinds of days.. or moments when you think.. damn.. i really wish he was around.. no matter how strict.. or how difficult he might have been.. as he very much was.. but always had a huge heart.. and always loved us and showed us love in his own way. A way that I myself have very much adapted. We are tough… we show tough love.. and it takes a lot for us to emotionally expose ourselves… always such a difficult thing to balance.. but that part of my life is a whole other blog.. or twenty of them..:P

So … another Father’s Day goes by and .. I celebrate and wish all the good dads of the world.. all the good responsible tough love dads out there an incredible father’s day..which should be everyday.
but today you get extra attention.. which is always nice no? =)

So there is this song from Eddie Veddar/Pearl Jam which i think embodies how I feel about my father.. and how i feel about myself in reference to who he was. i couldn’t have put these words better myself.. and this is why i love and respect musicians who create from the heart. This is why i create from my heart. This is why my father did everything with his heart, even if we didn’t always understand the message.. the intention was good and is now more than ever understood.

Happy Father’s day Papa.. you are missed.. and i look forward to seeing you again.., hearing you play guitar and teaching me about the philosophy of life and hard work.

Thank you. =) 


Missing from this image is my brother.. who is also a very talented artist.. like my sister who is an amazing makeup artist.. and then there is me.. the youngest… we all take after our father in our creative ways. Thanks Papa.
This was on a cruise way back when.. I was 11 or 12 years old. No piercings yet.. but i was very very into my Alice in Chains, Black Sabbath and Led Zeppelin.. =)

I am very much like him.. in my own way.

“Oh dear dad
Can you see me now
I am myself
Like you somehow
I’ll wait up in the dark
For you to speak to me
I’ll open up
Release me”

and i really do wait up in the dark.. so i can speak to him.. and i do..

life is an amazing thing..

i hope you can appreciate and enjoy this song for what it is.. and what it means to many like myself.. and of course Eddie =)


One thought on “Dad….

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